I never had Diabetes classes before. I wish I would have… for me, for my father. I wish I would’ve known more about this disease and how to control it back then, before he died. And he was good, really disciplined, so what happened? Lack of information? Lack of resources? But I can’t turn back time, and I can’t regret the past or get stuck in it. I still can do things for me, thinking of my father; and knowing wherever he is, he wants me to be healthy.
I’m going to my first Diabetes class today. I’m looking forward to learning as much as I can, but also getting to meet other people in the area who are dealing with the disease. I love making part of online communities, but it’s nice to meet locals I can become friends with.
I better go and get lunch ready so I can leave early. 🙂
I’m so happy… so happy! Small battle won today. After almost two weeks of seeing three digits on my glucometer screen, today I got an 86 before dinner. I just wanted to share. 🙂 Wow… 4 posts today. Heh!
My husband and I are very active in the online community. We both keep weblogs (that’s how we met!), belong to different message boards, have made friends this way, and we enjoy it. I asked him to join TuDiabetes.com, so he can get informed and keep up to date with everything diabetes related.
He joined the community, and he posted a blog entry today. I read it, and I cried. I cried because I’ve been putting on this happy, optimistic face, but sometimes I do feel overwhelmed, cheated, and I wonder why on earth I had to inherit my dad’s disease. Not to mention the guilt for being a diabetic and making my husband worry about me.
I feel especially frustrated when I test my BG and it isn’t anywhere near normal. The numbers given by my diabetes educator don’t seem right; I know they can be lower, I know I can go lower; yet there is something missing for me to attain them. So I get upset and cry, I do anxiety eating, and I ingest more carbs than suggested (not a lot, but certainly not what the doctor wants.) It’s a vicious cycle I have to break by doing other things instead of going to the kitchen. But it’s more complicated than that.
For what is worth, I’m glad to have found communities where I can share my thoughts and get help. And I’m extremely thankful for having a man in my life who will do whatever he has to do to help me.
One of the things that gets on my nerves the most about diabetes is hurting my feet. I try to take good care of them, putting on cream every day, not going for pedicures (fungus… eeek!) and such. Accidents do happen, though; like this morning when I cut open my right pinky toe opening the door. I saw little stars… It hurt so much, and then the bleeding. Had to clean it, put on a band-aid, and watched it get the red spot.
It’s better now. Let’s hope it heals fast.